I am writing to inform you that I am not going to write a post today. You see I’ve come down with a bad case of blog-fatigue. I was going to get my mum to write me a note to excuse me from today’s post, but then I thought I should probably do it myself. You know, what with me (supposedly) being a writer and all.
So yes, there’s no post today. But before you start your bitchin’, Regular Readers should remember that you’ve been served five home-baked beauties this week. Remember “An Assembly To Remember“? Yep, one of mine. Remember “It’s All In Who You Tell It To“? Nope, didn’t think you would. Not many of you read it and, if you did, you certainly didn’t comment. Except MM, of course, but then he’s pathological when it comes to commenting (thank the lord).
As for you Weekend Readers, we all know that you’re just here today to catch up on what you missed during the week. And don’t think I didn’t notice you weren’t reading during the week. Because I did and it hurt me real bad. Many a night I sobbed myself to sleep wondering where you’d got to. No, don’t say a word. Not. A. Word. I’m not interested in hearing your excuses, especially if it involves you having some kind of life. In any case, my lack of post today will have you thanking me for having one less NDM rant to catch up with now. See I’m nice like that.
And then there are my Accidental Readers to whom I say Welcome! Grab a pew and feel free to stay a while, even if your hostess is nowhere to be seen. Why, there’s 77 other posts on the menu for you to choose from. But if you’ve come here looking for “lactating asian babes”, then I heartily apologise for wasting your time with my irresponsible tagging and offer you this link. And yes, they are quite the mama-jugs aren’t they.
So, after 13 straight weeks of writing six days a week, it’s official: I’m downshifting. It’s just sooooo the Hip Thing To Do – just look at Joaquin Phoenix and the Global Economy! (They’re two separate examples, by the way. I’m not by any means suggesting JP’s “Bye! Good” to acting had anything to do with the world’s financial downturn. At least not directly.)
Here’s the deal: I’m cutting my blogging to five days a week and then, when the Festival of Consumerism starts to get on top of me (say, this time next week?), I might just start writing whenever the muse touches me. But hey, if that muse looks anything like Daniel Craig in the latest Bond film, that muse can touch me as much as he wants, whenever he wants, wherever he wants. No, really.
Thanks for reading. See you on Monday. You know you want to…
Best wishes, etc